Tuesday, April 04, 2006

WHY NEWTON COMMITTED SUICIDE???

Here is the reason.



Once, Newton came to India and watched a few Tamil movies that had his

head spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics

were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had

done.



In the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was confused to such an extent that

he went paranoid. Here are a few scenes



1) Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't

be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great

Rajanikanth is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet

passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is

cured! Long Live Rajanikanth!



2) In another movie, Rajanikanth is confronted with 3 gangsters.

Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife.

Guess, what he does?
He throws the knife at the middle gangster? & shoots the bullet towards

the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both

the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the

middle one.



3) Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster. Rajanikanth has a revolver but

no bullets in it. Guess what he does. Nah? Not even in your remotest

imaginations.



He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots,

Rajanikanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches
the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun....

Bang...the gangster dies...



This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and

decided to go back. But he happened to see another movie for one last

time, and thought that at least one movie would follow his theory of

physics. The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the

world hasn't changed. Oops, not so fast!



The 'climax' finally arrives.

Rajanikanth gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a
very high wall. So high that Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like
one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use. Rajanikanth

has to desperately kill the villain because it's the climax.

(Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually impossible?)



Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun

in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall,

he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air.

The first gun fires off and the villain is dead.



Newton Commits Suicide!!!!!!!!!

Monday, April 03, 2006

Enjoy Drinking

It has been scientifically proven that if we drink one litre of water
each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than one
kilo of Escherichia Coli Bacteria found in water that contains feaces.
In other words, we are consuming one kilo of shit. However, we do not
run that risk when drinking rum, gin, whiskey, beer, wine or other
liquors because alcohol has to go through a distillation process of
boiling, filtering and fermentation.



THEREFORE -

It Is better to drink alcohol and talk shit than to drink water and eat
shit !!


ENJOY DRINKING!!!!!